IT’S the biggest moment of Cameron Cullen’s footballing life, but the Gold Coast Titans half admits making his NRL debut on Sunday will be tinged with sadness given he can’t share it with his brother.

Cullen was yesterday named in place of the injured Tyrone Roberts at five-eighth in the Titans team to play the Sharks at Cronulla.

His first instinct on being told by Gold Coast coach Neil Henry he had achieved his lifelong dream was to ring his older brother, Justin.

Justin died in an accident during a surfing trip in the Maldives last year after jumping from a boat and not resurfacing.

“He would’ve been the first person I would’ve called when Neil told me (I’d made the team),’’ Cullen said.

“He would have been over the moon, he would have been just as happy as I am – probably even happier. He’d be booking his flights to Sydney.

“It’s bittersweet really. I’ve just achieved something I’ve been trying to do my whole life and he was a major part of that. Without him I wouldn’t be where I am.

“Definitely I would have loved to be able to call him and tell him that I’ve finally got a crack at playing NRL. I just hope he’s watching over the top at Shark Park.’’

While Cullen is still only 22, he has been involved in the NRL programs of all three Queensland clubs. He has completed stints with the Broncos and Cowboys before inking a second-tier contract with the Titans this year after Kane Elgey’s season-ending knee injury.

A grieving Cullen moved back from Mackay – where he was playing with North Queensland’s feeder club the Cutters – to the Gold Coast after Justin’s death last year to be closer to family.

Football was not at the forefront of his mind, but Cullen never gave up on his NRL dream.

“After my brother passed away, I had a pretty good hard think about things and I decided to come home,’’ said Cullen, who with partner Charis has a three-month-old daughter.

“I didn’t really base that decision on playing NRL, I based it more on being alongside my family.

“I definitely never thought about giving up. I tried to play a couple of weeks after it happened and I couldn’t, my head wasn’t in the game. I took the rest of the year off and then I moved home.

“But I never thought about quitting. NRL is something I’ve always wanted to do.

“I never would have given up on it and I know (Justin) never would have wanted me to give up on it.

“I just needed some time to clear my head and then it probably made me work even harder.

“When I got the call that Kane Elgey had been injured and I had a chance to train and trial, I think it made me really want it.’’

Cullen said he would play his natural game alongside halves partner Ashley Taylor, taking the ball to the line and providing another kicking option – something the Gold Coast missed when Greg Bird was shuffled from lock to five-eighth against the Broncos last start.

“I’m not going to be coming in there trying to do too much. I’m just going to come in and play like I play every other game and if that takes a bit of pressure off Ash and helps him out a bit then that’s good,’’ Cullen said.

“It’s not about me, it’s about the team and going down there and doing my job for the team, that’s my main goal.’’

Henry said Cullen was ready to play at NRL level.

“He’s been playing very good football in the Queensland Cup, he’s had his pre-season with us, he didn’t let anyone down in a couple of NRL trials,’’ Henry said.

“Ash Taylor needs some help there, Tyrone Roberts is not going to be right and Birdy is happy to go back and play at lock and we’ve got confidence that Cullo will do the job.’’

William Zillman has been named on an extended bench but Henry admitted he could yet make his way into the game-day 17, something that is likely if the co-captain pulls up well after making his comeback from a calf injury in the Queensland Cup on Sunday.

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Hope he kills his first grade debut, his brother would be proud of him coming this far

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